Do You Trust Yourself?

Dear Friends,

Happy Thursday!!  I hope you have a huge list of things you are thankful for today.  If you don’t, create one.  It will shift your mood and your day, guaranteed!

Today I’m thankful for a sweet experience with my daughter.  She said, “Mom, I realized something- I never really trust myself.”  She went on to explain that: she won’t speak up in class, in case she might be wrong; she doesn’t take risks, in case she might look stupid; she is quick to pass instead of taking the shot because she might miss; and she needs validation from someone else before she will believe she is right about homework.  She doesn’t trust herself.  She is living her life in order to not make a mistake, which really isn’t living at all.  Can you relate? At least 3 of the clients I coached this week discussed similar struggles.  Failure to trust yourself will keep you safe, yes, but ultimately the result is you will be completely unfulfilled and miserable. 

Living in insecurity and self-doubt cripples forward progress. It requires external validation and therefore generates victim mentality and perfectionist tendencies.  Chronic lack of trust in oneself creates a fixed, all or nothing mindset, where failure feels fatal and must be avoided at all costs.  If we can’t trust ourself, then we for sure can’t dream or visualize our future.  In fact, this lack of self-belief creates learned helplessness. It utterly denies the seeds of greatness that lie within every single human soul.

When I asked my daughter if this “never really trusting herself” was something she wanted to keep, she was torn.  There is safety in this mentality which appeals to her introverted personality.  However, she is realizing that living this way is stunting her growth and stifling her gifts, talents and creativity.  Self-belief is scary, vulnerable and risky.  Is it worth it?  

Bravery and courage are undeniable necessities for building self-belief.  Willingness to make mistakes and mess up are a prerequisite to learning to trust oneself.  Recognizing that failures are necessary, not negative, is part of maturing into a growth mindset and absolutely critical to accomplishing goals and realizing dreams.

When you argue for your limitations long enough, you get to keep them.  It really is up to you… self-doubt or self-belief?  Stagnation or progression?  Fear or Faith?  You are the boss of your brain and you get to decide.  Schedule a coaching call with me if you’d like some help with this.

Remember, YOU ARE DESIGNED FOR GREATNESS!!

Rooting for you always,

Candice Noss

PS

One of my very best friends, the amazing Kristen Toone, is presenting on September 21st, [7:30]-9:00 am at Ogden Weber Tech BDO Campus (918 W 2nd St., Bldg 10A, rm 125).  She will be speaking on “The Pursuit of Fulfillment- How to be the most effective leader you can be”.  It is a free event and breakfast will be provided.  This will be well worth your time- Kristen is phenomenal!!  Email kristen@resultsgroupllc.com to register.

PPS

2 last minute spots opened up for our ELEVATE Women’s Adventure Retreat (September 21-24 in St. George)!!  We need them filled by Monday, so contact me asap if you are interested. 🙂 Here is a list of a few of the adventurous things we will be experiencing: 4-hour ATV dinner/sunset tour, Canyoneering, e-biking and slot canyons in Zions, yoga, intuitive flow painting, hiking, hot tubbing, games, motivational speaker, giggling, reflecting, elevating… Cost- $950, Value of the Memories/growth/reset- Priceless!!

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